Home-Owned

“We need your resignation.”
“What are you talking about? I’m the Governor.”
“And?”
“And, I’m the Governor. Look, I’m grateful for all of the contributions you and your friends made. And continue to make. But you don’t own me.”
“Don’t we?”
“Are you kidding? You’re kidding, right?”
“We can help you fabricate a family crisis. Make you look like a real hero.”
“Just who do you think you are?”
“I think we should be asking that question of you.”
“Look here, I did everything I promised you I would. The tax breaks, the rezoning of the business district, all of it. I took chances that alienated me from my own team there for a while. So please understand that I mean this from the bottom of my heart. Fuck off.”
“It doesn’t work that way.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Eliot Spitzer, Eric Massa, Chris Lee, Jack Ambramoff, Mark Sanford, Mark Foley, John Ensign. All used to be good friends of ours.”
“Huh?”
“You got a cell phone? Use the internet? Facebook? Twitter?”
“Are you threatening me?”
“Patriot Act. Keeps domestic terror from getting out of hand, if you know what I mean.”
“Oh, shit. The case of the fraudulent derivatives. Really?”
“Like I said, anyone who threatens my boss’s livelihood is considered a local terrorist threat. My advice to you is simple – take care of that family crisis that’s going to happen an hour from now. Your successor is a very competent man.”

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12 thoughts on “Home-Owned

  1. sparrowsong

    *shudders*

    Politics always creep me out. Glad you’re feeling better, btw! A bit belated, I know…

    Reply
  2. jeremythurston

    Scribbla, I enjoy reading your posts because I’m ADHD and they send me through a loop of guessing games. Its fun to read your work cause its like solving a puzzle. Multiple scenarios went flying threw my head like monkeys in the wizard of oz. At first I figured it was a scandal with the mob, maybe the governor had been black mailed. It cant be a California governor, the terminator would have gone all G.I. Joe on this guy. But alas, its just simple politics, one governor was following directions, maybe he asked too many questions who knows. He was a bad governor and he ended up paying for it. What a tool.

    Reply
    1. screen_scribbla Post author

      I’m really pleases that you can get so much out of the stories. That really makes it feel like it’s worthwhile to keep writing. Thank you very much for your support Jeremy.

      Reply
  3. chesshirecat

    I feel like a fly on the wall in the Governor’s office. Listening, contemplating what all this portends for the man. I can feel his spirits sink after his “I’m done with you” speech, only to realize, it’s more than a matter of sleeping with dogs…there is no flea dip to control the pests he absorbed from his indiscretions.

    I’m anxious to read a complete book of yours. The stories here have me feeling like a beggar on the street, staring longingly into an ice cream shop with only lint balls in my pocket.

    Reply
    1. screen_scribbla Post author

      The fly on the wall is a great analogy. At this point I’m just anxious about writing a complete book, lol. Thanks for your encouragement. It really means a lot to me.

      Reply

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